Do you trust in Something Greater?

A reflection by Heidi Knofczynski

Do you remember the trembling glasses of water in the movie Jurassic Park?  In this scene some park guests being treated to a grand tour are stranded just outside the now de-electrified T-rex paddock.  Then the sounds of thundering footsteps are heard off in the distance moving towards them.  The footsteps are so powerful that even from a distance they create a vibration that causes the water inside the glasses to ripple slightly.

BOOM!  Something great and terrible is coming this way… BOOM!  Something powerful….BOOM!  Something greater, and if you endure it you will never be the same!

It is a terrifyingly effective scene.  Something like that feeling grips me as I read today's Gospel from Luke.   As Jesus speaks to the crowd His words fall with such portentous weight that, for me, it triggers a trembling inside.   His unfathomable reality exposes my fragmented, abstract, Christ-haunted spirituality.  He has come to take us beyond our superficial expectations into the unknown of eternity.  He has come to cast off all that we cling to to distract us from our nothingness.  Fear is a natural response to death.

BOOM!

In Ecclesiastes Solomon saw how we “chase the wind “in search of something greater, something that will help us outlast death.  Riches, pleasure and even wisdom may serve to distract us, but ultimately they only give the illusion that our life “under the sun” has meaning.  Solomon’s wisdom kept running into the same unavoidable obstacle:  Death means inevitable nothingness.  We are shadows that cannot overcome that darkness.  Until then, don't do evil and cast your bread upon the waters.  In other words, don't cling to stuff, rather enjoy life before nothingness of death absorbs you into its shadow.  Vanity of Vanities! 

But there is something greater than Solomon here.

BOOM!

 

Solomon’s wisdom goes to the brink of death, but there all he sees is darkness.  Jonah is taken further; he goes into the belly of a fish, which should have been a tomb, in order for God to bring an urgent warning to the notorious city of Nineveh.  This city, whose ruthless reputation filled all who heard of it with fear and loathing, listened to the man who came from a tomb bringing them a fearful message.  They listened and cast off their evil identity, through prayer and fasting and placed their hope in a power that overcame a tomb.

And there is something greater than Jonah here.

BOOM! 

We must cast everything upon the waters; our hopes, dreams, who we think we are and even (like the crowd that gathered around Jesus) who we think
that Jesus is.  What is only a shadow within us must be overcome. We will be left with an acute awareness of our nothingness,  But Something Greater has come to us, in all His earthshaking reality.  Endure it, do not run and hide.   Let His perfect love overtake you to cast out the fear of death to this world, because death cannot absorb Jesus into its darkness.  Jesus is no shadow. 

BOOM!  Something greater has arrived!

What are you clinging to today that needs to be cast off?

Update:  I forgot to add this Switchfoot song, BA55...."I believe you're the fire that could burn me clean"

Light is Sweet

Light is sweet! and it is pleasant for the eyes to see the sun. However many years mortals may live, let them, as they enjoy them all, remember that the days of darkness will be many. All that is to come is vanity.  Ecclesiastes 11:7-8 (USCCB)

Jesus spoke to them again, saying, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” John 8:12 (USCCB)

Quoheleth reminds us that our life on this earth is fleeting and will ultimately end up in darkness, unless we cry out to Jesus who brings us the light that will never fail, never cease.  Jesus is the answer to the vanities of this life.  As we prepare to begin our Lenten journey, let us always bear in mind that our efforts to come closer to the Lord will always be tainted by our human weakness.  We will be tempted to think that it is useless and accomplishing nothing -- do not give up!  You are directing your heart and your soul to the True Light, and the True Light will accomplish what your human weakness cannot.

Peace and Grace to all!
Heidi

The Call From Narnia

A reflection on Narnia, everyday life and God's call from eternity.

By Heidi Knofczynski

CCC 30, “Let the hearts of those who seek the LORD rejoice.” Although man can forget God or reject him, He never ceases to call every man to seek him, so as to find life and happiness. But this search for God demands of man every effort of intellect, a sound will, “an upright heart,” as well as the witness of others who teach him to seek God.

"It started out as a feeling,..." 

Our family recently watched Prince Caspian on our weekly movie night, and I guess I was in one of those nostalgic moods, because as I was watching the ending, and as the theme music was swelling, I was transported back to my childhood days.  Days when I deeply longed to find the portal that would take me to Narnia, or some other wonderful world.  A place where I could not only see wonders, but be a part of them.  A place I was certain existed in my heart, though I had no way to access it.

and then turned into a quiet hope..."

Then came Junior High, and it was in that time that I learned that what I really should long for was to be popular and to not make a fool of myself.  (In Junior High you make a fool out of yourself by divulging that you have spent more than a few afternoons sitting in your grandmother's closets --she had the closets with the best prospects for adventure-- hoping beyond hope that a door would open up on a world where heroism and valor, beauty and great love were things that could be attained in actuality and not just in the imagination.)  Very quickly I moved on to more rational, down-to-earth, and attainable pursuits. I focused my longings, even my spiritual ones, on things that could be found "under the sun." These worldly things pretend to be just as wondrous and, all to often, seem to be all there is to satisfy deep longings.  They stifle the call of eternity. Then adulthood comes and duties and responsibilities shrink our hopes even more.

I have seen the business that God has given to mortals to be busied about.  God has made everything appropriate to its time, but has put the timeless into their hearts so they cannot find out, from beginning to end, the work which God has done.  Ecclesiastes 3:10-11 

"which then turned into a quiet thought..."

How quickly timeless yearnings in our hearts are diverted!   I know that much of our daily life is made up of mundane and often dreary duties, (I am doing laundry and changing diapers as I am writing this so, believe me, I know!) but even in the midst of this concrete, material world every one has moments when you know there is something more.  What do you do when that little feeling of God's wonder and mystery tugs at your soul?  Respond to it!  Even for just a second acknowledge that you are being called to place you deepest hope in eternity, to hunger for it -- to believe in it!

"which then turned into a quiet Word..."

I may have stopped searching in closets for Narnia, but I am grateful that I never completely could shake the feeling of being out of place in this world, or else I may have ignored my longing for that wondrous world.  Because occasionally that yearning becomes a sharp pang, a joy unfulfilled, calling me toward it, but remaining just outside of my grasp.  All I have to do is sit in my backyard and hear the cottonwood tree whispering in the breeze and see it’s leaves magnificently sparkling in the sunlight and I feel that I am sitting on the edge of a profound assembly. Like that tree and all of nature are hearkening to a call, a call that I feel but I cannot hear with my ears. For a moment I am lifted up in spirit to a place where time does not hold me captive and wonders are poured out eternally.

My backyard cottonwood tree

The heavens proclaim your wonders, O Lord; the assembly of your holy ones proclams your truth.  For who in the skies can compare with the Lord or who is like the Lord among the sons of God?  Psalm 89 

"And then that Word grew louder and louder..."

But just as quickly I find that I am still just hoping, yearning, hungering and mourning -changing diapers, doing laundry, worrying about this, that and everything else under the sun.  Was that a siren song I was lost in? There is a real pain in re-entering the world under the sun when you can feel such wonders at hand. Maybe that is why, as our movie concluded, I could hardly hold back my tears, as the High Kings and Queens of Narnia went back through the door back to their ordinary, anonymous lives. No longer known as kings and queens, no longer fighting great battles or rejoicing in their victories.  No longer in the presence of Aslan. They are caught back in the quickly flowing time of this mundane world.

 "until it was a battle cry!" 

Raising his eyes toward his disciples Jesus said: “Blessed are you who are poor,for the Kingdom of God is yours.  Blessed are you who are now hungry, for you will be satisfied.  Blessed are you who are now weeping, for you will laugh.  Blessed are you when people hate you, and when they exclude and insult you, and denounce your name as evil on account of the Son of Man. Luke 6: 20-23

How wonderful the sound of Jesus’ words are! He is answering the unanswered pondering of the preacher in Ecclesiastes who has nowhere but under the sun to place his hopes.  His words reassure us not to ignore the eternal yearning in our hearts, they are His call.  His battle cry alerting those who hear them to fight the false hopes of this world and look to Him for true hope. Eternal hope. You and I are being called to the great assembly that rejoices in Him as He rejoices in you!  Let it grow into a battle cry that each one of us proclaims!

How is God calling you?

Christ Jesus might display all his patience as an example

for those who would come to believe in him for everlasting life. 

To the king of ages, incorruptible, invisible, the only God,

honor and glory forever and ever. Amen. 1 Timothy 1:17

The sub-headings for this post were taken from the first verses of the song "The Call", by Regina Spektor.  The song can be found on the Prince Caspian soundtrack.  

Timeless Stirrings and Ecclesiastes

Today is the birthday of my youngest child, Max, he is one year old.  It has been a graced year.  Graced with the quiet stirrings of the immortal God in my heart.  Stirrings that are so easily overlooked, but in God's mercy, I had an infant who forced me to stop, allowing me just be present to Him; while I was nursing Max or simply just holding him and rocking or walking, walking, walking.  And in those moments of nothingness, where I am not doing anything of high material value, moments where I am living the Gospel (albeit very imperfectly)  in such ordinary and unnoticed ways:  feeding, clothing, comforting,  if I am very quiet and still in my soul (because, you can be sure that there is not much quiet and stillness externally with very young children all around) my heart surges with thanksgiving, and here I can just begin perceive the eternal presence of God.

These thoughts brought to mind our OCBS study of Ecclesiastes and a verse from that book that whispers in my heart at these times, because these moments are so fleeting, and yet I want to cling to them not ever letting them go!  Alas!  And since I am celebrating a birthday today, I did not have time for a proper Scripture post soI thought that I would indulge myself and share, along with a video montage I made for my son's first year, my past musings on this verse!

       “He has made everything appropriate to its time and has put the timeless into their hearts, without men ever discovering, from beginning to end, the work which God has done.” ( Ecclesiastes 3:11)

 I would love to freeze particular moments in which that sweet coalescence of joy, peace and security that in the blink of an eye are here and then scurry off only a moment later.   In these moments I can feel a stirring of the timeless in my heart.  Joy and thanksgiving surge forth from me, yet I also feel sorrow because I live in time and these perceptions and moments are so fleeting, and so other worldly.  They lift me out of time for an instant, and pierce my heart with an intense yearning for the eternal.  Are these moments invitations for a deeper meditation on things of heaven?  Did moments such as these, fleeting and passing, with no hope or expectation of them ever reoccurring, spur Qoheleth's deep questions?   With no afterlife to look to it must have been like a cruel joke to have such a yearning for the eternal in the heart with no possible way to satisfy it!

As each year passes in the lives of my children I strain to implant the memory of how they looked and talked; of the things they did that made me frustrated or made me laugh, or broke my heart with the beauty of it all.  I have taken countless pictures and written endlessly in journals just so I can cling to the memory of moments of perfection lost to time.  Yet, I still forget and I know that I have lost moments and memories in my life to the passage of time.   I pray to God, who has put that timeless yearning in my heart, to help me to follow the wisdom in the ponderings of Ecclesiastes:  To be faithful and attentive to the season that I am in.  I am thankful for the wisdom that says enjoy this moment now and do not worry about how time may fade the memory:    “For he will hardly dwell on the shortness of his life, because God lets him busy himself with the joy of his heart.”( Ecc 5:19) And beyond that I put my eternal hope in Christ, who makes all things new,(Rev.21:5)  and who does not put a yearning in my heart  that cannot be fulfilled.  Even in Ecclesiastes we hear an echo of this verse:  Verse 3:15 says "what now is has already been; what is to be, already is; and God restores what would otherwise be displaced." 

 Ecclesiastes vividly shows that this fulfillment is not to be had during our days under the sun. I can release my vain grasping at past happiness, it prevents me from living and enjoying the simple, fleeting pleasures of the time I am living in now.  Ecclesiastes highlights the problem of futility that only Christ can satisfactorily answer.  And as my heart is pierced with the joy and blessing of His eternal stirrings, awoken in the precious minutes with my children, I am learning to let it flow into to One who put that timelessness into my heart and the One who makes all things new!

Happy Birthday Max!  

 Peace an Grace to all!

Heidi