The Runaway Bride

A Reflection on Isaiah 5:1-7 N.A.B. 

By: Larry T

In the 1999 romantic comedy film Runaway Bride Julia Roberts plays Maggie Carpenter and Richard Gere plays Homer Eisenhower (Ike) Graham. Maggie is a spirited and attractive young woman who has a long history of unsuccessful relationships. She has been engaged three times, but anxiety over the permanence of marriage has caused her to runaway each time on the morning of her wedding day. On three occasions husbands-to-be, parents, bridesmaids, groomsmen, ministers, friends, musicians and caterers have gasped in shock at her failure to appear.

Meanwhile, in New York, columnist Homer Eisenhower Graham or "Ike" writes an article about Maggie that contains several factual errors, supplied to him by a man he meets in a bar who Ike later learns was one of Maggie's former fiancés. Ike is fired for not verifying his source, but is invited to write an in-depth article about Maggie in a bid to restore his reputation. He travels to Hale, Maryland, where he finds Maggie living with her family. And once again she’s engaged to be married. The fourth husband-to-be is Bob Kelly, played by Christopher Meloni, a football coach at the local high school.

Maggie predictably runs away the fourth time deserting Bob and the wedding party at the church. Eventually Maggie and Ike fall in love, marry, and live happily ever after.

The screenplay authors could have looked to the Bible for inspiration because of the Prophet Isaiah’s song about a runaway bride.

¹ Let me now sing of my friend,

          my friend’s song concerning his vineyard.

My friend had a vineyard

          on a fertile hillside;

² He spaded it, cleared it of stones,

          and planted the choicest vines;

Within it he built a watchtower,

          and hewed out a wine press.

Then he looked for the crop of grapes,

          but what it yielded was wild grapes.

³ Now, inhabitants of Jerusalem and men of Judah,

          judge between me and my vineyard:

⁴ What more was there to do for my vineyard

          that I had not done?

Why, when I looked for the crop of grapes,

          did it bring forth wild grapes?

⁵ Now, I will let you know

          what I mean to do to my vineyard:

Take away its hedge, give it to grazing,

          break through its wall, let it be trampled!

⁶ Yes, I will make it a ruin:

          it shall not be pruned or hoed,

          but overgrown with thorns and briers;

I will command the clouds

          not to send rain upon it.

⁷ The vineyard of the LORD of hosts is the house of Israel,

          and the men of Judah are his cherished plant;

He looked for judgment, but see, bloodshed!

          for justice, but hark, the outcry!

- Isaiah 5:1-7 N.A.B.

Isaiah’s sang his song about a vineyard at a gathering of some sort, possibly at the annual harvest Feast of Tabernacles. All sorts of performances would have been going on in the area between the booths built of leaves and branches; I can visualize the Prophet mingling with the celebrating people and announcing a love song about his friend and his vineyard.

To his listeners the vineyard was an image for a bride (Song of Solomon), so they were looking forward to a ballad suited to the festive atmosphere. And Isaiah’s song does get off to a good note. His friend’s vineyard was on rich soil; he planted the choicest vines on it, and did everything he could to make them flourish. The audience must have settled back smiling in anticipation of Isaiah’s next words, but the mood suddenly changed; instead of choice fruit, the vines produced nothing but inedible sour grapes, small, hard smelly things - the vineyard was a bitter disappointment.

The group immediately understood the point of Isaiah’s song: the bride was unfaithful - trust and hope were betrayed - his friend’s love was rejected. How will the song end? The terribly saddened friend handed over his vineyard to be plundered - he renounced the bride, leaving her in the dishonor for which she had no one to blame but herself.

The stunned audience suddenly realized the deeper meaning of Isaiah’s song: The vineyard, the bride, is Israel – the very people who are present. God gave them the way of justice in the Torah, he loved them, he did everything for them, and they answered him with unjust action and a regime of injustice. Isaiah’s love song was a threat of judgment. It finished with a gloomy prospect – that of God’s abandonment of Israel, with no sign at this stage of any further promise.

In the movie Maggie ran away from four bridegrooms on the morning of her wedding day. Engaged couple’s excitement and anticipation rise incrementally with the purchase of wedding rings, selection of a wedding dress, mailing of wedding invitations, rehearsal dinners, and all of the detailed planning that goes into even the simplest of weddings. Emotions on the morning of the wedding are at a feverish pitch ranging from joy, elation, worry, to hope. But what if our loved one, that person that we planned to spend the rest of our lives with, failed to show? Wouldn’t we be overwhelmed by disbelief, shock, shame, dismay, and betrayal? How does God feel when he is left standing at the altar by his people? His anguish is expressed through the Prophet Jeremiah’s lament:

² Go, cry out this message for Jerusalem to hear!

I remember the devotion of your youth,

          how you loved me as a bride,

Following me in the desert,

          in a land unsown.

³ Sacred to the LORD was Israel,

          the first fruits of his harvest;

Should anyone presume to partake of them,

          evil would befall him, says the LORD.

⁴ Listen to the word of the LORD, O house of Jacob!

All you clans of the house of Israel,

⁵ thus says the LORD:

What fault did your fathers find in me

          that they withdrew from me,

Went after empty idols,

          and became empty themselves?

⁶ They did not ask, “Where is the LORD

          who brought us up from the land of Egypt,

Who led us through the desert,

          through a land of wastes and gullies,

Through a land of drought and darkness,

          through a land which no one crosses, where no man dwells?”

⁷ When I brought you into the garden land

          to eat its goodly fruits,

You entered and defiled my land,

          you made my heritage loathsome.

- Jeremiah 2:2-7 N.A.B.

Still, we know that God never gives up on his people. It’s in the New Testament where we get a sense of His love for us. Allegorically in the parable of the Good Samaritan (Luke 10: 29-37 N.A.B.), “the road from Jerusalem to Jericho turns out to be an image of human history; the half-dead man lying by the side of the road is an image of humanity. Priest and Levite pass by; from earthly history alone, from its cultures and religions alone, no healing comes. If the assault victim is the image of Everyman, the Good Samaritan can only be the image of Jesus.” (Jesus of Nazareth, Pope Benedict).

In the gospel of Luke we read about God’s joy when just one of his children accepts his love:

⁷ I tell you, in just the same way there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous people who have no need of repentance.

- Luke 15:7 N.A.B. 

The Heavenly wedding party is waiting. Will I be a runaway bride leaving God standing at the altar lamenting over me, or do I have the humility to reconcile myself to him? This is an unavoidable decision that we all have to make.

Your Way, Lord

A reflection on the Mass readings for the Twenty-fifth Sunday in Ordinary Time

By: Sharon Nelsen

The Lord recycles truth in our lives; always giving us new thoughts, new words, new ways to think, speak and to act on old truths.  Today, as I read from Isaiah 55.7-8, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord,” I smiled—yet again the Lord had recycled that truth in my life.

When I was an RCIA companion in our parish several years ago, I was inspired to write this prayer, a prayer I knew was inspired by the Holy Spirit for it flowed from my pen and needed little editing.  After I wrote it down, I named it, “A Prayer for Continued Growth.”

Blessed Lord, God of Heaven and earth,

            Draw me into right relationship with You:

                        May Your Thoughts become my thoughts

                        May Your Ways become my ways

                        May Your Words become my words

            I invite You to touch and heal all that is wounded

                        Within my mind

                        Within my heart

                        Within my spirit

            Set me free from any false beliefs I hold

                        In my thoughts

                        In my habits

                        In my values

            Fill me with Jesus, Your Way, Your Truth, Your Life

                        In my relationship with You

                        In my relationship with others

                        In my relationship with self

Open my lips that my mouth may proclaim Your Wondrous Deeds, praising  You now and forever.  Amen.            Sharon Nelsen, April 18, 2012

This past week was a week full of conflicts and so I asked the members of our faith-sharing group to pray over me.  As they prayed, the prayer for continued growth came to my mind.  I realized that I had something deep within me that perceived the words as conflictual, as if God and I were at odds in our thoughts, words and ways; we were on a collision course.  In an understanding that can only come from the Holy Spirit, I realized that God, who calls us into partnership, is not in conflict with us.  Rather, God reassures us that the seed we plant, the leaven we work into the dough of our lives are beginnings; our thoughts, words and ways are not necessarily “wrong.”  They are by nature, our good human nature, limited. 

When God says, “I will complete the work I have begun in you,” God reveals that my good thoughts, good words, and good ways are materials for God’s thoughts, words, and ways, which are cosmic, while mine are very local.  God welcomes those beginnings in us and longs to receive them so that He can do even greater works with them.

The Gospel reading from Matthew 20.1-16a illustrates the point clearly:  The laborers, who were hired at the end of the day, received the same wage as those who had been hired at the beginning of the day, express their thoughts about the justice of it all:  “These last ones worked only one hour, and you have made them equal to us, who bore the day’s burden and the heat.”  (Matthew 20.12)

God’s way, as landowner in the parable, is generosity, a generosity that hovers high above human justice, leavening the dough of Divine Justice with cosmic compassion.  Have you ever stood on a corner and waited for a truck to come by to pick you up and take you out to the job site so you could earn a day’s wage and feed your family?  Recently, as I drove through a section of downtown Omaha around 8:00 in the morning, I saw four Hispanic men standing on a corner, waiting.  It reminded me of my high school days in Los Angeles, when I first saw a crowd of Hispanic men clothed for labor, standing along a whole block of sidewalk.  I asked my Dad why they were there.  He replied that they were “day laborers” waiting to be hired.  When we drove by the same area hours later, there were still many men waiting.  And if we had driven by even later, we would have seen men still waiting.

What does it take to stand in the day’s heat and wait, wondering if your family will have food that night, or if the rent can be paid, or if the water and light bills can be paid? 

Would you rather be standing idle, struggling with fearful thoughts, or laboring with others, knowing you can provide what is needed for those entrusted to you?

Help us grow, Lord, into your way, a way that urges us to generous compassion.  May we sow our tiny seeds with hope, entrusting the growth to Your Ways which are “As high as the heavens are above the earth.”  (Isaiah 55.9)

Solemnity of The Nativity Of Saint John the Baptist

Today is the Solemnity of The Nativity of Saint John the Baptist.  Today we celebrate the birth of the man who, as Saint Augustine tells us, “represents the boundaries between the two testaments, the old and the new.”  All of the events surrounding the birth of the Baptist suggest that the obscurity of the Old Testament prophesies are to be revealed and illuminated by the one who John is to proclaim, who John had already been proclaiming as he leaped in the womb of his mother Elizabeth at Mary’s arrival.  Leaping like David dancing before the Ark of the Covenant.  Even from the womb John points us past the signs to the ultimate realities.  This is why we celebrate his birth with a Solemnity!

John points us out of the wilderness, out of confusion, to the fulfillment of the words of Isaiah, Hosea, Jeremiah and the prophets.  Words that often were mysterious, and attain their deepest meaning only in the light of Christ’s salvific mission.  And us too, he points us past the mundane to Jesus, in whose light even the most obscure life is elevated and glorified.
 
Of course evil hates clarity and light.  The enemy of your soul will always try to confuse your vocation, obscure your accomplishments and highlight your failings. Even John the Baptist experienced moments of confusion and doubt as he faced down evil in his martyrdom (Matthew 11:2).  From his place of imprisonment John lived out what he had been preaching to all who would listen:   He turned to the Lord; he asked Him for reassurance and in the Lord’s response he was satisfied.  Even in his doubt he fulfilled his mission which is so beautifully portrayed in so many paintings;  in sending his messengers to Jesus, John was pointing to Him and showing us all the way out of our own confusion and self-doubt.
 
If your are tossed between self-condemnation and self-justification follow the pointing finger of the one who cries out in the wilderness.  Like John, go to the One who gives meaning to the obscure prophesies of the past, and the seeming vanities of this life.  Ask the Lord to show you how your life and your toil can be filled with His light and imbued with deep meaning and glory.

Though I thought I had toiled in vain,
and for nothing, uselessly, spent my strength,
yet my reward is with the LORD,
my recompense is with my God.
For now the LORD has spoken
who formed me as his servant from the womb,
that Jacob may be brought back to him
and Israel gathered to him;
and I am made glorious in the sight of the LORD,
and my God is now my strength!
It is too little, he says, for you to be my servant,
to raise up the tribes of Jacob,
and restore the survivors of Israel;
I will make you a light to the nations,
that my salvation may reach to the ends of the earth.  Isaiah 49:4-6and for nothing, uselessly, spent my strength,yet my reward is with the LORD,my recompense is with my God.For now the LORD has spokenwho formed me as his servant from the womb,that Jacob may be brought back to himand Israel gathered to him;and I am made glorious in the sight of the LORD,and my God is now my strength!It is too little, he says, for you to be my servant,to raise up the tribes of Jacob,and restore the survivors of Israel;I will make you a light to the nations,that my salvation may reach to the ends of the earth.  Isaiah 49:4-6

Saint John the Baptist,  pray for us!
Heidi

Into Your Hands I Commend My Spirit

“Though all may have their faith in you shaken,
mine will never be.” Matthew 26:33

It has been a tough Lent for me, a long dry spell in prayer has continued though, not completely without respite.  Along with that a family situation suddenly came upon us that will continue to demand much prayer, love and sacrifice into an uncertain future.  And here I am with nothing to offer, not a thing.  One day, as my husband and I were waiting on some news with our loved one, I reflected on how empty I felt, how impoverished I was in this particular situation.  How impoverished I had always been.  I stand at a crucial moment, like Peter at his denial of the Lord, relying on my own store of love and fidelity and I find am empty! In that emptiness, fear, resentment and bitterness were threatening to invade. “Lord!”  I cried, “I have no love!” 

The Lord GOD is my help,
therefore I am not disgraced;
I have set my face like flint,
knowing that I shall not be put to shame.  Isaiah 50:7

It was a Thursday, so, since I had nothing to do but wait, I prayed the Luminous Mysteries of the Rosary.  Oh, because of my dryness in prayer I tried to distract myself with other things, but in the end I relented to the call to pray.  I don’t think I ever finished it, because as I prayed the second Luminous mystery, The Wedding of Cana I began to realize that Our Blessed Mother was helping me to ask for His love to minister to this situation, and in fact to overflow into my past failures to endure in love and faithful patience.  In turn, I was being invited to wait on the Lord.  How can one trust such an intuition?  How can one cling to it with nothing to see as proof it will come to fruition?

He trusted in God;
let him deliver him now if he wants him.  Matthew 27:43

But as I have journeyed through this Lent the meditation of waiting on the Lord has kept coming back.  I went to a day of reflection given by the Institute of Priestly Formation.  We meditated on trusting and waiting on the Lord, especially in situations where our own love cannot suffice.  We wait on His perfect love to flow our through us.

But Mary Magdalene and the other Mary
remained sitting there, facing the tomb.  Matthew 27:61

And I wait, with hope and faithfulness for what I don’t quite know.  I walk forward into this uncertain situation with the trust that what I need will be given when I need it.  I wait with Mary Magdalene and the other Mary, facing the tomb, not knowing but trusting.  I wait relying not on my own strength, but on the strength of the One who conquers all.

Christ Jesus, though he was in the form of God,
did not regard equality with God
something to be grasped.
Rather, he emptied himself,
taking the form of a slave,
coming in human likeness;
and found human in appearance,
he humbled himself,
becoming obedient to the point of death,
even death on a cross.
Because of this, God greatly exalted him
and bestowed on him the name
which is above every name,
that at the name of Jesus
every knee should bend,
of those in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
and every tongue confess that
Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father. Philippians 2:6-11

Into your hands Lord, I commend my spirit
Blessed Holy Week,
Heidi

Whose Kingdom Are You Seeking?

Reflection for Sunday, March 2 -- The Eighth Sunday in Ordinary Time

By: Judy Morss

Gospel of Matthew 6:24-34

Jesus said to his disciples:
“No one can serve two masters.
He will either hate one and love the other,

or be devoted to one and despise the other.
You cannot serve God and mammon.
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life,
what you will eat or drink,
or about your body, what you will wear.
Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing?
Look at the birds in the sky;
they do not sow or reap, they gather nothing into barns,
yet your heavenly Father feeds them.
Are not you more important than they?
Can any of you by worrying add a single moment to your life-span?
Why are you anxious about clothes?
Learn from the way the wild flowers grow.
They do not work or spin.
But I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor
was clothed like one of them.
If God so clothes the grass of the field,
which grows today and is thrown into the oven tomorrow,
will he not much more provide for you, O you of little faith?
So do not worry and say, ‘What are we to eat?’
or ‘What are we to drink? or ‘What are we to wear?’
All these things the pagans seek.
Your heavenly Father knows that you need them all.
But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness,
and all these things will be given you besides.
Do not worry about tomorrow; tomorrow will take care of itself.

Sufficient for a day is its own evil.”


Ash Wednesday is this week, and so we enter into the Lenten season. As I enter into the Lenten desert, I hope to draw closer and closer to our Savior, Jesus the Christ. The readings for this Sunday seem to have a common focus seeking the Kingdom of God and his righteousness. There we will find the love of God and His care for us. Isaiah 49:14-15 tells us that even if it were possible for a Mother to forget her child, "I will never forget you."

Our response to Psalm 62 is "Rest in God alone, my soul" and we are told that "Only in God is my soul at rest; from Him comes my salvation."  In Matthew 6:24-34 Jesus tells his disciples: "No one can serve two masters. He will either hate one and love the other, or be devoted to one and despise the other." He further tells us that we should not worry about our life or the day to day issues in our lives. All that we need will be given to us. Our focus must be on the kingdom of God.

We are not to worry about tomorrow; "tomorrow will take care of itself."  To stop worrying about tomorrow is not an easy thing. Jesus invites me to trust Him and know that He will give me what I need, according to His plan for me. Now comes the hard part. His plan for me; not my plan for me. I need to hear and receive this invitation to trust in a more personal, deep way. I need to feel the comfort that Jesus offers and accept and feel the bond, the special connection and the tenderness that God has for me.

God has a plan for me; He created me to achieve that plan. As I reflect on these readings, it becomes more and more obvious to me that I MUST decide who I will serve. When I focus too much on my wants and needs (security issues) then I am serving a false god. There is freedom in the decision not to worry about all of the external things, but to trust that God will provide for my needs. When I release myself from serving my own needs, I free myself to serve others. And that change in my focus, opens me up to all that the kingdom of God provides.

With peace and love,
Judy

Be the Light

Reflection for Sunday, February 9 --  The Fifth Sunday in Ordinary Time

  Judy Morss

Gospel of Matthew 5:13-16
Jesus said to his disciples:
“You are the salt of the earth.
But if salt loses its taste, with what can it be seasoned?
It is no longer good for anything
but to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.
You are the light of the world.
A city set on a mountain cannot be hidden.
Nor do they light a lamp and then put it under a bushel basket;
it is set on a lampstand,
where it gives light to all in the house.
Just so, your light must shine before others,
that they may see your good deeds
and glorify your heavenly Father.”
The readings for this Sunday seem to have a common focus on light. Isaiah 58:7-10 tells us "If you bestow your bread on the hungry and satisfy the afflicted; then light shall rise for you in the darkness, and the gloom shall become for you like midday."

Our response to Psalm 112 is "The just man is a light in darkness to the upright" and we are told that ""Light shines through the darkness for the upright; he is gracious and merciful and just."
In Matthew 5:13-16 Jesus tells his disciples: "You are the light of the world.... Just so your light must shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your heavenly Father."

Sometimes when I look around me, I see a lot of darkness. When I listen to the news, I often see and hear even more darkness. But then I will notice a person whose light shines brightly. Like the teenager next door who shovels the sidewalk for his elderly neighbor and takes no pay. Then there is a woman from church who brings a couple of elderly ladies to Mass every Sunday morning. I see our people at Eucharistic Adoration 24 hours a day, seven days a week and the light shines brighter and brighter.

There certainly is a lot of darkness in the world, but when I begin to feel some despair, I look to those people who do not "light their lamp and then put it under a bushel basket." And that makes me refocus on being the light. Our readings for this day tell us what we need to do. We need to feed the hungry, shelter the homeless, cloth the naked, encourage and support those who are afflicted.

I have lots questions I need to ask myself. Am I gracious and merciful and just? Do I reach out to those in need? Am I a just person; can my soul be part of the heavenly light? I am commanded by my Savior to become light; to be light. If we all persevere and become the light, we can help put out the darkness. From darkness to light, that's my goal.

With peace and love,
Judy

Rejoice!

Joy!  That is the message this Sunday.  We light the pink candle, and we look to our joyous celebration of Christ’s birth as well as to His second coming, which we wait for amidst the groaning labor pains of all creation. Even in suffering our joy is at hand. 

This is why I love Enya’s version of O Come, O come Emmanuel.  It has that soft mournful tone of a world that is subjected to futility, a world that longs for redemption.  And echoing in the background, as if from somewhere outside of time you hear: Rejoice! Gaudete!

And we need to know that our rejoicing is not a glib refusal to accept the harsh realities of our day, but an enduring hope that we can indeed reject the concerns of the flesh, which lead to death, and receive the Spirit of God, which is not enslaved by fear:  "For you did not receive a spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you received a spirit of adoption, through which we cry, 'Abba, Father!'" Romans 8:15

We received this through Christ who came with power and strength as a baby, born into a family.  Who came and touched individuals, those who yearned for redemption.  Do you yearn?  Every candle we light during Advent should increase our yearning. Pray for that, and you will begin to perceive the joy that is always present in His Kingdom.

The desert and the parched land will exult; the steppe will rejoice and bloom. They will bloom with abundant flowers,and rejoice with joyful song. The glory of Lebanon will be given to them, the splendor of Carmel and Sharon; they will see the glory of the LORD,the splendor of our God.Strengthen the hands that are feeble, make firm the knees that are weak, say to those whose hearts are frightened: Be strong, fear not! Here is your God, he comes with vindication; with divine recompense comes to save you. Then will the eyes of the blind be opened, the ears of the deaf be cleared; then will the lame leap like a stag, then the tongue of the mute will sing. Those whom the LORD has ransomed will return and enter Zion singing, crowned with everlasting joy; they will meet with joy and gladness, sorrow and mourning will flee.

Isaiah 31: 1-6A; 10

Advent blessings to all!
Heidi

I decided to add a video of my daughter singing in the Wayne State Madrigal choir's Celtic Advent Carol...I apologize for the late start and the shaky camera work (I was holding an infant).

An Epiphany

A reflection on the Solemnity of the Epiphany of the Lord

Opening prayer for the Solemnity of the Epiphany of the Lord:

May the splendor of your majesty, oh lord we pray, shed its light upon our hearts that we may pass through the shadows of this world and reach the brightness of our eternal home.

Having just returned from visiting my family in Minnesota I must say that as I pass through the shadows of this world I stumble quite a bit!  Especially around my extended family!  How is one to be a light to others when one spends so much time stumbling over personal ineptitude and in-eloquence.  I do not know how to  respond to hot button moral issues, like "same-sex" marriage or cohabitation - issues that hit very close to home for several of my family members-  without stumbling into to cold superiority, or succumbing to moral relativity!!!  If  I finally muster the courage to say anything, in my effort to navigate somewhere between both extremes, my words come across as weak and confused, too spiritual to be practical, too vague to be understood!  So mostly I shut up, and pray silently for light.  But I always feel that I ought to have done more.

 

Even as I despair of ever serving my Lord in courage and in truth,  as well as in compassion, the light of the star that guided the wise men to Truth Himself is once again brought forth in the liturgy of our Church.  And the message is to keep following, keep praying, to keep adoring, to nurture an interior awareness that all creation is in some way revealing the Mother and her Son, and to allow the majestic beauty of the Nativity of our Lord to draw me out of myself, deep into His Spirit. Just in pondering the Nativity, particularly as I listen to some of the beautiful and sacred hymns of Christmas, all my frustrations and anxieties over my family disagreements, wash away, all of my personal struggles and failures with disordered desires become a bit more ordered.  

In fact, what is illuminated is that my anxiety is caused by my pride.  A pride that will not bear the misguided accusations of being uncaring or unkind or hateful.  My pride that bristles at the attempts by a few family members to bait me and others into a discussion that will only cause discomfort and embarrassment to other members of our family. My pride that would love to find the right words to put them in their place, or to lead them to the light...except it would be my light and not the splendor of His majestic light.

And once I step out of the shadow of my pride I can now perceive an interior light:

  "Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there be any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think of these things.  Keep on doing what you have learned and received and heard and seen in me.  Then the God of peace will be with you." Philippians 4: 8-9 

I know that is not one of the readings for this Sunday, but, for me, it was like the star of Bethlehem, directing me to let His light shine through me, through focusing on the goodness in even those who oppose me.  Doing this protects me against trying to illuminate truth (or rather, cut down my enemies) through my fancy words or my forceful arguments.  It does not mean that I do not defend truth, or hide my faith away. If I must defend truth with arguments and debates, I will be guided by the light those inspired words of Saint Paul.

  And somehow I am strengthened with these thoughts and now I can simply serve Him in love and endure with Him in the shadows of the world.  I can bask in adoration of the little child who has come for me.  I can be drawn into His heart by the beauty of His Mother. If others have not yet perceived the light, if they have not yet perceived a desire for God in all of their deepest desires, than as the Magi left Herod in his darkness to  rejoice in and follow the light, I must continue on to follow God, and trust that God does not intend to leave anyone in darkness who is truly searching for the light.  Maybe they will follow.  Maybe their hearts desires will be revealed as they step into the splendor of His majesty.

Come and adore Him.  Be drawn unto Him by His light!.  

Rise up in splendor, Jerusalem!  You light has come, the glory of the Lord shines upon you.  See, darkness covers the earth, and thick clouds cover the peoples; but upon you the LORD shines, and over you appears his glory.  Nations shall walk by your light, and kings by your shining radiance.  Raise your eyes and look about you; they all gather and come to you:  your sons come from afar, and your daughters in the arms of their nurses.  Then you shall be radiant at what you see, your heart shall throb and overflow, for the riches of the sea shall be brought to you.  Caravans of camels shall fill you, dromedaries from Midian and Ephah; all from Sheba shall come bearing gold and frankincense, and proclaiming the praises of the Lord!  Isaiah 60:1-6 

Merry Christmas!

Heidi 

Oh!  And just for fun, because this made me laugh:

Swept Away

The readings for this Sunday speak of repentance and new beginnings, of God's yes to our plea of "Lord have pity on me; heal me though I have sinned against you." (Responsorial from Psalm 41). It is a good place to begin as we look to Ash Wednesday and our Lenten journey this year.  I have written about Isaiah 43 before because it is one of my favorite readings in Isaiah.  But, as we all know, the way of repentance and redemption is not easy.  It is a continual baptism into a death to sin and a rising in the Spirit.

True repentance and true redemption can only begin in those terrible moments when we get an honest glimpse of our own depravity, and when we begin to understand how we cling to it, how we hide in it.  I love the Leonard Cohen song:  By The Rivers Dark and I listen to it a lot during Lent.  It perfectly captures the foreboding sense that one is being hunted,  and the fear of being found, even though you know you are hopelessly lost.

I remember once attending a talk by Deacon James Keating of the Institute for Priestly Formation on sin and redemption, the theme being "Suffer the coming of Christ.". He began speaking on the Scriptural events of the Fall, and he spoke of God's message to Adam and Eve.  With the deep menacing tone the Deacon paraphrased God's Protoevangelium in Genesis 3:15 into:   "I am coming to get you."  My first thought was, does he realize how scary that sounds?  Surely he does not mean it to be so frightening!  What happened to Jesus Loves Me?  I quickly realized that Deacon Keating intended the message to sound this way, and the shock of it quickly moved me past some highly sentimentalized notions of my Savior, a long overdue grace. His coming is a terror because, if I am to authentically receive Him, I must let go of my lifeline to things that are passing and let Him sweep me away.

And I am afraid of being swept away, of being consumed in religious zeal, and making some rash commitment that will be difficult to keep in another frame of mind.  Of confronting a sinful tendency that tenaciously rooted and will not be dealt with easily. I find it better to not try than to try and fail, or even better to plead ignorance!  I want to be cool, I want to be accepted, I don't want to be fanatical or foolish. I want to be loved by all, admired by all, in control and comfortable ectetera, blah, blah blah....... 

And I am afraid of being swept away, of being consumed in religious zeal and making some rash commitment that will be difficult to keep in another frame of mind, like confronting a sinful tendency that is tenaciously rooted and will not be dealt without sacrifice.  I find it better to plead ignorance, than to try and fail.  I want to be cool, I want to be accepted, I don't want to be fanatical, I want to be loved by all, admired by all, in control, ectetera. blah, blah, blah....If I let go of these desires, if I see that they fuel sinfulness, I will have to allow God to do what He will with me.

  I have come to realize that after the first hurdle of growing in the Christian faith -which for me was the moment when I was confronted with belief in Jesus, God Incarnate who was bodily resurrected from the dead- the next hurdle is to let the passionate love of Him completely enrapture you.  To envelope you and scour you of false attachments and hidden shame.   To understand that I am not my own and that if I yield and allow Him to sweep me away, I will have no control over where He will take me.  I am not there yet, I still hide from Him, but He is still pursuing me, and those footsteps are getting closer.  My will is getting weaker, because more and more I am seeing Hid beauty in contrast to the desert of my soul.  This Lent I hope to confront what I am clinging to and hiding behind, and plea for the Lord to have pity on me.

Behold, I am doing a new thing, can you not perceive it?

Peace and Grace,
Heidi

Our Advent Journey

Advent is the liturgical season that precedes and prepares for Christmas. It is a season of hope and of longing, of joyful expectation and of peaceful preparation. As we continue on our Advent journey, we prepare for the coming of our Lord. Part of the preparation is reconciliation. The following is taken from a Communal Reconciliation Service. I hope you find the meditations helpful to your personal journey.

Liturgy of Asking Forgiveness

We come now to ask the Lord of justice for His forgiveness. We ask in the name of Christ who is the light ofthe world. Let us listen to our hearts.

"Rejoice, rejoice, Emmanuel, has come to thee O Israel."

God promised through Isaiah to be out everlasting light. How have I been a light, or a ray of hope to my family, my friends, those I work with? How have I protected my darkness so that no one can get in?

Jesus, fill us with your light.
"Rejoice, rejoice, Emmanuel, has come to thee O Israel."

God promises to make us radiant in the Light of Christ. Do I allow my values and desires to be formed by the Gospel? Have I used my light to work for justice and act with compassion? Have I been hope for those around me?

Jesus, fill us with your light.
"Rejoice, rejoice, Emmanuel, has come to thee O Israel."

Jesus tells us to care for the needs of the poor and one another. How do I share God's goodness with others? How do I fail to care for the poor and those in need?

Jesus, fill us with your light.
"Rejoice, rejoice, Emmanuel, has come to thee O Israel."

We have been seeking to be Christ for one another and for the people with whom we journey on the path of life. How have I made ready the way for Christ to come to birth in this day and in this place? Have I neglected to go beyond myself to point the way to Christ?

Jesus, fill us with your light.
"Rejoice, rejoice, Emmanuel, has come to thee O Israel."

God calls us to build up Christ's body, the church. Is Christ resent in my life, in my relationships with others? What in my life cries out for redemption? For new life? For what am I most grateful?

Jesus, fill us with your light.
"Rejoice, rejoice, Emmanuel, has come to thee O Israel."

Let us pause for a quiet moment .......... .let us think of what we most want to bring to our God.

An Act of Contrition
My God, I am sorry for my sins with all my heart.
In choosing to do wrong and failing to do good,
I have sinned against you whom I should love above all things.
I firmly intend, with your help, To do penance, to sin no more,
And to avoid whatever lead me to sin.
Our Savior Jesus Christ sufferedand died for us.
In his name, my God, have mercy. AMEN

Isaiah 63: 17 "Why do you let us wander, O Lord, from your way, and harden our hearts so that we fear you know? Return for the sake of your servants, the tribes of your heritage."
64:7 "Yet, O Lord, you are our father; we are the clay and you the potter: we are all the work of your hands."

Peace and blessings to you through all this Advent journey
Judy

Light a Candle, Jesus is Coming!

"The people who walked in darkness have seen a great light;

 Upon those who dwelt in the land of gloom a light has shone.

You have brought them abundant joy and great rejoicing.

As they rejoice before you as at the harvest,

as people make merry when dividing the spoils.

For a child is born to us, a son is given us;

upon his shoulder dominion rests.

They name him Wonder-Counselor, God-Hero, Father-Forever, Prince of Peace.

His dominion is vast and forever peaceful.

From David's throne, and over his kingdom,

which confirms and sustains by judgement and justice,

both now and forever."  Is 9:1-2, 5-6

Advent is here, and hopefully we all are getting into the mindset of watching and waiting for the coming of Jesus!  Our household has a few Advent traditions that are surprisingly powerful! At dinner we add the lighting of the Advent wreath and a Scripture reading to our mealtime prayer. In the evening we again light the wreath and  have special readings and hymns around it.   We also read short Nativity related stories. I say that it is surprisingly powerful because the atmosphere is often less than reflective, it is more of a three ring circus!
 
 The baby is fascinated by the flame of the candles and we need to be vigilant so he does not set himself on fire.  The three year old and five year old fidget through passages of Isaiah, waiting for the short Nativity stories they read from tiny ornament-books that are then hung on a tiny Christmas tree near our prayer area .  The children are also biding their time until the candles are blown out.  Who gets to place the ornament on the tree and who gets to blow out the candles are of great importance, and woe to my husband and I if we have not made clear whose turn it is beforehand (this happens way more often than it should)!  After the little book is hung on the little tree we sing a verse of  O Come O Come Emmanuel, and this step cannot be skipped no matter how late it is!

It is very easy for me to believe that these rituals are unnecessary and burdensome while I am dealing with fidgety, tired and sometimes bickering children. The younger ones don't yet understand some of those fancy and archaic words from the prophets! But this is Advent, the season where we are told to watch and be prepared for the coming of the Lord, who came to us so long ago in the most unexpected way.  In fact, often when I have been graced by a powerful encounter with the Lord, it has come upon me in mundane, unexpected and ordinary ways;  moments when I have endured in what, at the time, felt like meaningless and uninspired duties or prayers.

And every year as Advent approaches the kids become excited for the rituals and the readings.  They associate the complex passages from Isaiah, or the Advent stations from the Magnificat, with  the eager and joyful expectation of Christmas!  They do not understand it all with their intellect yet (and who of us does fully understand the magnitude of the Incarnation?).  However, they are beginning to develop the wonder and awe at the Lord's coming at Christmas, which with persistence and endurance will transcend the gifts and decorations, and open their eyes to the coming of the Lord in other ways!

 In fact, the Advent prayers and readings we have done year after year have rooted the wonder and awe at the coming of Jesus as a baby more deeply into my children's memories of past Christmases than the actual receiving of the presents from Santa that they so joyfully wait for!  And this creates a deeper yearning for Jesus' presence in all aspects of life!  Maybe they will not so easily overlook Jesus' presence in the poor, the hungry, those who are afflicted or who are outsiders!

 So let us joyfully light a candle! Jesus is coming!

Peace and Grace,
Heidi

Update:

I was just reading on the blog Conversion Diary about epic Advent failures!  I just had to add, that even in our failures to cultivate an Advent devotion that becomes a cherished tradition, the effort to show our children that the joy of Christmas is Jesus can be a seed planted in their hearts. They will still learn that the excitement around Christmas is only superficially about presents and Santa, and Christmas will always, even in times that are sorrowful or difficult, have a profound and mysterious joy to it.  Some of my epic failures in Advent devotions have come up in conversations years later, and I have found to my surprise, that at least one on my kids was impacted by it in some way;  in some way it began to root inside their heart that they deeply desire the Advent of the Lord!

The Vineyard of the Lord

I have been pondering this Sunday's readings, and as always I respond, in varying degrees, at first to each reading individually. Isaiah 5: 1-7 is the song of the vineyard, and in it, the house of Israel is likened to a vineyard that, despite the best of care, produces only wild grapes.  The vineyard is left for destruction and ruin:

Yes, I will make it a ruin:  It shall not be pruned or hoed, but will be overgrown with thorns and briers; I will command the clouds not to rain upon it.  The vineyard of the Lord of hosts is the house of Israel, the people of Judah his cherished plant;  he waited for judgement, but see bloodshed!  For justice but hark, the outcry! (6-7)

The justice of the Lord is a terrifying thing, revealing what we would rather not know about ourselves, and to endure it is to be refined and renewed.  To refuse it is to allow the wild grapes to crowd out the life of God in you, to evict your soul from your body and be reduced to a mere wild creature. In the Song of the Vineyard, the Lord mercifully withholds his care of the vineyard, to reveal that there is no true life here. The language is dire, a response to the Lord is urgent, our very soul depends on it.

But do not despair, for there is more to you than your failures! The responsorial Psalm ( taken from Psalm 80) is a cry to the Lord to restore His people, and they will no more turn away from Him!  And it is spoken with a confidence in the Lord, that though they are enduring great trials, they know that they are still His chosen people. "Give us new life, and we will call upon your name."

The Gospel from Matthew is yet another parable about the vineyard:

Matthew 21:33-43

Jesus said to the chief priests and the elders of the people: 

"Hear another parable.

There was a landowner who planted a vineyard,

puts a hedge around it, dug a wine press in it, built a tower.

Then he leased it to tenants and went on a journey.

When vintage time drew near,

he sent his servants to the tenants to obtain produce.

But the tenants seized the servants and one they beat,

another they killed and a third they stoned.

Again he sent other servants, more numerous that the first ones,

but they treated them in the same way.

Finally, he sent his son to them thinking ,

'They will respect my son.'

But when the tenants saw the son, they said to one another,

'This is the heir.

Come, let us kill him and acquire his inheritance.'

They seized him, threw him out of the vineyard and killed him.

What will the owner do to those tenants when he comes?"

"He will put those wretched men to a wretched death,

and lease his vineyard to other tenants

who will give him the produce at the proper times."

Jesus said to them, "Did you never read in the Scriptures:

The stone that the builders rejected

has become the cornerstone;

and by the Lord has this been done

and it is wonderful to our eyes.

Therefore I say to you,

the kingdom of God will be taken from you

 and given to a people that will produce fruit."

And of course it picks up on Isaiah's theme of the vineyard.  A theme that will allow those who he is telling it to to pronounce what the owner of the vineyard should rightfully do to those wretched tenants, and, if they have the heart to hear this parable they will recognize themselves as individuals and, collectively as a people, the children of God. God has given them many chances to produce fruit, but he will give them up to their own wretchedness if they do not hear his voice with their heart, and repent like the Psalmist!  His kingdom will prevail, without you if you so choose.

These vineyard parables that Jesus has been telling the past few Sundays have sunk deeply into my soul, they have gently stirred up the envy, resentment and fear that have become tenants in my heart.  And these tenants hold me back, or provoke me to respond to situations in ways that can never produce good fruit (but they do produce some fruit, it is I who lack the will to determine if it is fruit that is of the Lord or not).

And unless the Lord, in his merciful justice, allows them to be stirred up, I might never recognize them as evil and needing to be purged from my soul. I now must choose to act, to allow the Lord to reclaim what is his.  Even when I am made aware of these tenants, I am weakened and powerless to demand that they leave on my own. I cannot bear to face their devastation in my soul. I cannot endure in my struggle against them.  Here is where these vices, now stirred up to my consciousness begin to bring down despair and discouragement.  I am the  wretched one who gave entry to the vices. Vices that have taken the choice plants that the Lord has sown and degraded them to wild grapes. They cause me to doubt that I would ever be capable of producing the type of fruit that God demands  They murmur that I will  be utterly destroyed if I allow the wild grapes in my soul to be rooted out.  If I allow the owner to rightfully access his vineyard!

And, I have learned, that I will be. I will have to die to the false identities, that are protected through envy and fear. The vices I have nurtured have diminished me, killing my soul, and are so integrated in my heart that upon the coming of the Lord I quake with fear because I know what will be found, ruins,desolation and rotted fruit.  And I know that the only remedy is the painful uprooting of the wild grapes.  The hedges that were meant to protect the choice vines are now protecting the wicked tenants, and they will need to be torn down. I will have to live in the briers and thorns that have overtaken my vineyard, exposed, to fully know that I am not a mere tenant in my soul haunted body.  I can now cry out to the Lord as the Psalmist does:

 "Give us new life, and we will call upon your name."


Hope is kindled, because in the merciful justice of God, he has allowed the enemies of my soul to be stirred up, and revealed.  But reviving me is a grueling battle, and I am tossed between self-justification and self-condemnation.

Paul's words to the Philippians now rain down just enough refreshment for my soul, they encourage me to open my eyes and see, see with the mind and heart of Christ!  To open wide my heart, and let go of my fear!  The temporal defeats are only that, temporary.  The ultimate victory is assured, and we can see the fruits of them already if we reach out to the Lord in earnest and honest prayer!

Phil.4: 6-9


Brothers and sisters:
Have no anxiety at all, but in everything,
by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving,
make your requests known to God.
Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding
will guard you hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.
Finally brothers and sisters,
whatever is true, whatever is honorable,
whatever is just, whatever is pure,
whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious,
if there is any excellence
and if there is anything worthy of praise
think about these things.
Keep on doing what you have learned and received
and heard and seen in me.
Then the God of peace will be with you.

God's merciful justice can be extraordinarily hard to endure, and there sometimes seems to be no point,only defeat.  Ask the Lord for what you need today to endure in the struggle, know that there is more to gain in enduring in God's mercy than a halo and wings.  The messiness of the moment are parts of the masterpiece.  But today is the day, do not let the unlawful tenants in your soul have one more day, for the Lord is coming.

Peace, Heidi

Reflections on Justice vs. Fairness

Isaiah 55: 6-9:  

 "Seek the Lord while he may be found, call him while he is near.  Let the scoundrel forsake his ways and the wicked his thoughts; let him turn to the Lord for mercy; to our God who is generous and forgiving.  For my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways, says the Lord.  As high as the heavens are above the earth, so high are my ways above your ways, and my thoughts above your thoughts".

In preparing for this Sunday's Scripture reflection a quote from one of my favorite C.S.Lewis novels, a book called 'Till We Have Faces' quickly came to mind.  The book is a wonderful read, it contains an underlying theme that nothing we see here on earth is yet in it's true form, thus, we do not yet have the capacity to understand it all.  In the book the main character, Orual, has come to the throne of the gods with a book of complaints that she has written against them, (it is set before the Christian era).  She is in the company of a dear old mentor of hers, the Fox, when he makes the extraordinary claim that she will not get justice from the gods, at least justice as she understands it.  "Are the God's not just?" she asks the Fox, to which he replies:  "Oh no child, what would become of us if they were?"

Thank goodness God's justice is not my justice. I can speak of understanding the gravity of God's justice, but his justice is perfect, and mine can often become shallow and petty, and fairness can triumph over justice in truth.   Does seeing justice done always mean that fairness is achieved?  And is we cannot see justice in a truer light, how will we ever be able to grasp what is true mercy?  It is not fair that a woman who is raped has to bear the emotional and physical burdens of a pregnancy for nine months, but how can we call abortion justice, or mercy? Have we lost our ability to perceive transcendent realities, like an innocent immortal soul that despite the injustice that has occurred in his or her conception, God has allowed and willed to live?  If we cannot discern the higher justice in allowing the child to be born, how will we even begin to be able to have an inkling about God's justice that is so far beyond our capacity to know?  Or how deep His mercy is?  Can I accept that I do not know all ends, and I must continue to call upon the Lord, whose greatness is unsearchable so that I can begin to understand that I do not understand!

If we lose the ability to appreciate the magnificent and unfathomable transcendence of God, and that our universe is full of signs pointing to this, directing us toward it, I fear that we will stunt all of our highest aspirations, both on a personal and a cultural level. Even if we mean them to provide lasting justice, these attempts will  prove to be a crumbling facade. We will get short term fairness, but in the end we will be weakened and our ability to call upon the Lord in truth will fade, because we will not have the heart to endure His greatness.

Anyone who has children knows what it can mean to serve the tyrant of "fairness" all the time.  It means that all projects have to be carefully weighed and measured, and generosity and creativity are sacrificed for it.  I have been a room mother to more that a few school parties, and it is getting increasingly difficult to find really fun and creative games, because, well....we don't want to seem unfair to the other class if your games are more fun, the other kids will be upset (seriously)!   Sometimes, though an apparently unfair situation can root out in you an area that really needs the generous mercy of the Lord.

The Gospel of Matthew has Jesus telling another parable, this one about a landowner seeking laborers for his fields.  At the end of the day all the workers are payed the same wage, even those who have only worked the final hour of the day.  And at this the faithful workers who labored all day in the sun complain that it is not fair!  His justice is not ours; and here he has, in his mercy, revealed that the faithful laborers in the field harbor in their hearts envy.  I say 'in His mercy' because it is all to common for the spirit of envy, or anger, or fear to be deeply hidden inside of us, and it is sometimes only revealed when our superficial ideas of fairness and justice are challenged.

 Here is the beginning of knowing the truth about ourselves, not so we can despair, but so we can call out to the Lord in truth!  And when we start to call out to the Lord in truth we will begin to understand that our understanding of life, joy, happiness suffering and death are far from complete.  He will begin to root out the ways in which we thwart authentic justice and therefore, authentic mercy. We will know of mercy undeserved, yet generously poured out, like Orual discovered in the book.   Because all is not yet revealed to us.  We can discover authentic fear of the Lord, which is the beginning of wisdom, a wisdom that we dearly need.

Here is an awesome reflection by Mon. Pope on the Archdiocese of Washington blog.
Peace and Grace, Heidi

Reflections on Romans 8

Sunday's readings are a banquet for all to be nourished from.  Isaiah 55's beautiful invitation from the Lord calls out to those who have ears to hear:

"come to me heedfully, listen so that you may have life"

The Lord himself will nourish and sustain us in all of our needs. In the Responsorial Psalm He will:

"satisfy the desire of every living being" 

"he is near to all who call upon him, to all who call upon him in truth" 

What is that desire?   It is here that I go to Romans 8:35,37-39:

 "Brothers and sisters:

What will separate us from the love of Christ? Will anguish, or distress, or persecution, or famine,or nakedness, or peril, or the sword? No, in all these things we conquer overwhelminglythrough him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life,nor angels, nor principalities,nor present things, nor future things,nor powers, nor height, nor depth,nor any other creature will be able to separate usfrom the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord."

It is the love of Christ that is my heart's desire, and when I truly heard this, when I listened in truth, some of the great temptations in my soul began to break open. In truth,I must face that I am I am frequently diverted from seeking out the love of Christ, but I so deeply desire it! And even in my sinfulness my famished heart still cries out to God, though I fear to acknowledge this. And yet, all my actions reveal a soul grasping for the love of God, but I often allow my worldly fears, not God, to direct my passions, and they become degraded and weakened.  There have been certain times in my life when I have succumbed  to the world and it's version of fulfilled desires; whether it is security in money, possessions, popularity or pleasure.  I cannot describe how overwhelming it was when I realized that in all that I was doing, I was always searching for Him!  How far I allowed myself to be led outside of God's protective love! The powerful words of Paul, and the wisdom of the Gospels and all of Sacred Scriptures have embolden me to let go of what I think is my hearts desire, to refuse to feed my famished heart with junk food. I will continue to come to the Lord, in His Word and in the Eucharist, to feed my heart with God's love and truth!  I will cry out for His love, and all of the readings for Sunday assure me that I have nothing to fear, he will not reject me or overlook me.  He will not send me away to find what I need elsewhere, but with great mercy, love and power He will fill me with His riches!